Change is hard. Break ups are hard. Staying in a relationship that you’re unhappy in is hard. Finding strength to leave a toxic relationship is hard. Changing careers or leaving a toxic work environment is hard. Moving to another area or state is hard. Staying where there is no opportunity or chance for growth and struggling to survive every day is hard. Finding your own way again is hard. Figuring out where to go now and what you want out of life is hard. Living with regrets and missing out on your dreams and real happiness is hard.
It seems like nothing in life is easy. We all have choices to make and sometimes we make poor choices but that doesn’t mean we have to live with them forever. Change and new, better choices are always possible. I’m not advocating tossing away a relationship, or a job, or anything else. If you want to stay and make it work do what you need to do. All things good take hard work too. Choose your hard. And even if you can’t change your situation outright right now there are things you can do to start in that direction such as:
- Figuring out what you want. Think about how you want to truly live. What inspires you, interests you, lights you up on the inside, feels good in your soul, makes you genuinely happy? What kind of life do you want to live? What is the goal you want to achieve?
- Figure out what you need to do to reach that goal and to make the changes you want. Research what you need to do or learn. Utilize the internet. Utilize your local library. Find out what other resources are available in your community that might be able to help you. Read. Learn. Plan.
3. Connect with others who are going in the same direction or who already have. Knowing that others are on the same journey or have succeeded tends to be a great encouragement and motivation. Try to find a mentor who is willing to share their knowledge and the steps they took to get where they are. Volunteer at places that will expand your knowledge and put you in contact with other like minded people. Read blogs, and books, and inspiring quotes. Listen to podcasts from people who have succeeded. Anything that teaches you, inspires you, and keeps you moving towards your goals is beneficial.
4. Build your support system. Spend time with people who support you, love you, build you up. Lean on your friends, your family, your spouse/partner. Work on your self esteem and confidence. Make a list of your good attributes and strengths. Keep it handy, read it many times each day, and let it remind you that you are capable of anything you set your mind to.
Having a dream, starting to build a plan, and looking toward a better future sometimes is all that’s needed to reignite a spark and start building momentum towards a brighter path and life. It won’t happen overnight. It will take hard work, perseverance, determination, desire, time, and most likely a strength you didn’t know you had. But on the other side there will be peace, joy, happiness, and a new pride in your ability to do anything you dream of. So choose your hard and get out there and make it happen. You got this!
